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It’s interesting to me that I can maintain my compassion level at work, with patients, families, and staff. I don’t seem to have hit that wall, yet. I love what I do. But I find it harder to be compassionate with my father. He has been experiencing some ongoing, but hopefully minor, health issues lately, and I want him to “suck it up.” I had the same problem when my mother was alive, before she went on hospice. Perhaps it was because I felt the need for them to be MY support (emotionally) and they couldn’t be. On the other hand, as I think about it, it might be that I feel I should “fix” their problems, whereas I am fully aware that I cannot “fix” the problems of patients, visitors, or even staff. Maybe it’s a combination of the two.
I will say that a deeply supportive outside relationship has helped me lately. When I feel overwhelmed I call this person and ask for prayer. Generally, he lets me talk about it and I feel better. I do know that he is praying also.