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Paul, when I began ministry a lifetime ago, a friend of mine gave me this advice, go to the hospital, visit the patient, but don’t get in bed with them. If I am emotionally engaged and worn, then I have to reflect on what hooks me in the situation. I have colleagues who are greatly disturbed that I don’t well up in tears at the drop of a hat. I think it is because, I check myself, and check for transference, go enabling, for unhealthy processing. I don’t think that makes me cold or uncompassionate. I feel it makes me more available to care and tend the spirit of the person with whom I am ministering.