All Courses Forums Course Discussion Forums Spiritual Care of LGBTQ Persons Starting the Conversation: LGBTQ spiritual needs Reply To: Starting the Conversation: LGBTQ spiritual needs


Wow, Trish. That’s great. Thank you for expanding a bit on how that wedding was a “coming out” for you. It is scary even for allies when you are anticipating negative feedback or pressure, and especially if you have your own mixed feelings and beliefs weighing in as well (which many of us do). I love that you and the couple created your own pronouncement and presentation, and that you got such positive comments!

For me, my fears have often been worse than reality in my coming out process. I consider myself extremely fortunate in that regard. Partly I think that is because I waited a long time before I got the courage to come out, and a lot of people already had a sense that it was true of me before I actually said it. Of course, thinking something to be true and having it verified are two different things.

And while my experiences have largely been positive, or at least restrained, I have friends whose worst fears have been realized. One of my good friends here in my town, who grew up here, was jerked up by the deacons in her Baptist church (including her father) and escorted out of the church physically, as a sign of their judgment and  “excommunication” of her. She and her life partner are now members of the church I belong to. But what terrible scars those experiences can leave.