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My previous statement should have read “Being a non-anxious presence is either a spiritual gift or a fruit of the Spirit or both.”
I just watched the reflective listening video. The formula’s are helpful. With affirming feelings, I might want to put things in the form of a question. Are you feeling _____________, because this is happening? It seems less threatening to me and invites clarification and further explanation. Stay with the feeling was one of our CPE mantra’s.